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Aug. 27th, 2009 | 01:24 am

Kerry Ellis' singing from 3:41 - 4:02 is actually my life at the moment. so addicted to this song I can't even begin to tell you.




also the note at 3:18 on this one... death. [plus I'm actually in the audience of this one, right at the front...yeah, she did that "fall down to my knees" bit right in my face. FITNESS!]



it's the little things that get me through.

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so here's a fun update for you...

Aug. 27th, 2009 | 12:34 am
mood: draineddrained

I've basically fucked up my life.

for the whole of semester 2 of my 2nd year of uni [this year just gone] I handed in no work. multiple reasons as to why; I hate the course, I was majorly depressed, my boyfriend was a complete jerk to me, I was working every hour under the sun....many many reason. and I didn't tell my mom and dad.

and nothing happened. I didn't get anything from my lecturers asking where the work was, uni didn't contact me at all...nothing. so I did my usual thing of completely blocking it out from my mind and trying to forget there was the small matter of 6 missing pieces of work.

cut to 3 weeks ago when I get a letter from uni telling me I've failed all my modules, I have to pay £135 to retake them and they have to be in by August 26th. but do I do the essays? no. because yet again I'm in my complete "my life is killing me" mode, I'm working every hour under the sun...yet again, and I don't understand what I'm supposed to write anyway because the lectures were so long ago.

it's now August 27th [28th technically] and I handed nothing in. I did sit in the library for 5 hours on Tuesday night attempting to write something, but the constant battle of "you have to do this" vs. "you don't WANT to do this because you HATE the course" ended in...well, you can tell which one won that round...

so tonight I told my mom all this on the phone, she literally had no idea about any of it. and her reaction was probably worse than the shouting I expected. not even a "we're so disappointed" which I expected too. nope. none of that. there was just a silence. then the usual questioning thing she does "but I don't understand why you didn't do any work. why were you unhappy?" then she said "well..why would we care anyway. it's your life. you'll do what you want." so she doesn't even care enough to be disappointed. it's beyond that. and then she finished with "well, you've got a lot of thinking to do, haven't you?" to which I replied "well, I'm coming home on friday [before I go on holiday] so I want to talk to you guys then" and she said "what do you need to talk to us for? it's your life. your decisions."

so yeah. majorly fucked up. my mom [and dad, as soon as she tells him] don't want to know. so I'm feeling a little bit of a headfuck right now.

I have a plan. sort of. well, I have about 3 plans...

plan 1] beg uni to let me retake the papers and finish my degree

plan 2] drop out, take a year out to work and save up, then re-apply to do a different degree, probably theatre

plan 3] drop out and get a job until I've saved up enough money etc. to go to NYFA

but I've no idea what to choose. I just want someone to say "do this, Holly." but I guess if I can fuck up like that, I have to grow up and make my own decisions. one of my best friends has just left uni after her first year [which I wanted to do but my parents wouldn't let me...] and she's now got a job as an au pair in NYC to save up for when we move there together...eventually. so it can be done. people DO drop out and don't end up on the streets. I just...I don't know...I want someone to tell me what to do, like I said.

just...fuck.

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so I may have just emailed NBC...

Jul. 27th, 2009 | 11:37 pm

To whomever this may concern,

Hi, I know this is totally last minute and you're taping the show in, what an hour? but if you get this in time PLEASE consider popping in our question/names/whatever on the show. Basically, we're writing from London, and we are "The London 15". We're a group of 15 Streepers [Streepers = Meryl Streep's fans] who get together, a lot, and spazz over Meryl Streep movies and we wanted to ask her one question. That's all. Just the one. Which is..

What is the craziest gift you've ever gotten from a fan? And what is the nicest?

[By the way, if the answer to either of these are "A star" then we gave it to her!]

That's all we wanted to say really. Tell her we're the crazy gals from the London Doubt premiere and that we heart her.

Ok I know this won't happen cos there's so little time before the show. But we just thought we'd email, cos you never know!

Love love

Holly, Gemma, Kerry, Jazz, Emily, Carys, Lourdes, Sarah, Vic, Laura, Lauren, Kathryn, Cat, Chantal & Clare

xxxxx

p.s. Your show is fricking amazing, Conan!! But you already know ;)

----------

SO IF THIS GETS READ OUT, IT WAS MEEEEEEE! yurr, i'm drunk...

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spazzing is this weeks activity

Jul. 27th, 2009 | 02:06 pm
mood: jubilantjubilant

yet again, i've been neglecting this blog.
i think it needs a makeover but i'm not entirely sure how to do that...hmm...anyone?

so i've been spazzing mucho over Meryl recently. because, let's face it, anything that woman does will undoubtedly make me spazz. she could walk across a room and i'd talk for half an hour about how she's the best person to ever walk across a room and how cute she did it! BUT i do have actual spazzy reasoning...

1) we had "Streeper Week"
Streeper Week consisted of around 7 Streepers [of the London 15 Crew - it's our official name now...it's even on Wikipedia!] living at Gemma's house for 5 days. Example of our insaneness? We took a picture with the tv at a specific moment in Silkwood...regarde...



and we ordered £90 worth of pizza under the name Meryl Gummer...



so yeah, we're pretty fanatic. i love those girls, so much. they make me feel..normal? ok so not normal, cos clearly we're not, but i love how we just get together from all over the country like once every couple of months and have a totally amazing time. we were brought together through Meryl. aah, that woman does wonderous things!

2) THE Oprah interview was released
any Meryl fan knows that the holy grail of interviews is the Oprah interview from 1996. it's something we have only heard about in legend; the interview where Oprah shows her the choice scene from SC and Meryl's never seen it before. and last week, it surfaced!! what do i think of it? well...for starters Meryl seems very timid throughout the whole thing. maybe because Bob's there and some of his interviewing skills have rubbed off on her? second, Meryl's face! oh, gosh...we were nearly crying! i really dislike Oprah. she interupts all the time and i never feel like she cares. i mean what exactly was she hoping to acheive by showing that? SHE didn't know what to say, all Meryl could say was "Why would you show that!?"...it was silly. you could tell Meryl knew it was coming because she tried to keep talking and change the subject. poor Meryl. i'm glad i've seen it now because i enjoyed the rest of the interview ["well, i go off by myself into a corner...to be alone...and try to remember...just how much money they're paying me!" but it was very hard to watch that bit.

3) MULTIPLE J&J interviews
i'm not watching any clips of J&J cos i don't want to spoil it, but i've been watching the interviews. and oh my gosh at the freaking fitness of this woman! hello, you're supposed to be 60, Meryl!! Not mid-30s!! HOW DO YOU LOOK THAT WAY!? oh gawd, i love her.

so yeah...reasons for my spazzing this week. only 6 1/2 weeks until J&J is released over here, good times!

oh and also...KERRY ELLIS IS COMING TO YORK! my mom saw the full extent of THAT obsession when she accidently found herself in the same room as me when i found out. how excited am i!? umm...thiiiiiiiiiiiis much! is it sad that i have dreams of her going round York and me bumping into her and then we go out drinking together? is it?

toodles for now
xxxx

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(no subject)

Jun. 10th, 2009 | 04:29 pm

AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!

ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim. ihatehim.

i get the feeling i'm going to spend all next year with a massive headache. i wish i hadn't taken this on. let it be someone else's responsibility to deal with him. it makes me want to cry. aargh.

but other than that i'm ok.

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